Yee Haw!

Lord have mercy. It's clear cowboy boots. In order to maintain my classiness, I think I need a pair. They can be my house shoes. They would fit right in around here.

Photo from TheFashionPolice.net they have all sorts of classy items, you should also check out the mohair pants. I'm saving up for them.


I kid, I kid.

Rock Band

Whereas we live in a trailer park, my boyfriend lives in a trailer country club. All of the trailers at his place are much nicer than ours and he gets to have a fire pit. Not to mention our kiddy pool. Because we are classy like that.
He also has something else that we don't have. Rock Band. Which is the single best video game of all time. I have no skill so I just sing. Last night we went over there because he just downloaded the Jimmy Buffett songs, which I LOVE.
Jimmy Buffett is HARD. The lines are three word lines and you have to hit them immediately. Oh well, it was still fun. We drank some beer and ate pizzas and it was awesome.
Earlier in the day when we were running errands something... ironic happened. I had some Coke cans in the back of my car that I kept forgetting to get out. Yesterday Sally Mae and I were in my car and my Sirius died. I looked back and noticed that one of the cans had exploded all over my back window. How fun. Well a little ways down the road we look behind us and theres a Coke truck.
Moral of that story is, don't leave cans of soda in the back of your car on a hot day.
But at least I got a new Sirius out of it, and all it was was a blown fuse. Whoops.

An Impromptu Get Together

Because we don't have "parties", since this is a classy family friendly trailer park, we have get togethers. We invite a few people over, drink some, smoke some, it's usually fun and always interesting.
Last night it was my boyfriend, my boyfriend's best friend, his roommate, me, and my roommate showed up eventually. It was actually one of the less interesting nights we've had here. Whenever Sally Mae got home she had a beer and then we conferenced in the bathroom. About terrorism in Australia. Because that's the kind of stuff you make up when you're in our bathroom.
Sally Mae has been sort of seeing this guy from work yet she flirted shamelessly with my boyfriend's best friend most of the night. Until she left at about two to go over to the guy from work's house. I still haven't heard from her so I hope she's alive.
I am the lame one and ducked out of the festivities early because I was exhausted. So whatever went on after I went to bed, I have no clue.

I know this is the second post today...

So I gave you a tour of the trailer park. Now I figured it's time to give you a tour of our lovely abode, the trailer. My roommate and I have tried very hard to make sure it's of utmost classiness. Let's start off with her room, and that way I can give you some background information about her as well.
My roommate will from now on be called Sally Mae. I want this blog to be as anonymous as possible. Sally Mae's room can only be described as a hazard. Which describes her as well. I really do love her to death. But you can not get into her room without almost breaking something. She has more clothes and more shoes than me. Probably the only person I have met who does. And luckily we wear the same size. She's 21 which means party for an 18 year old girl like myself.
Our living room is where we spend the most time and have the most fun, besides the bathroom, but more on that later. We have several classy items, the most being the huge Playgirl poster we have of an almost naked man. Which is directly across from a door that is open a lot. We have a Kat Von D poster for the boys who visit, but the Playgirl one is strictly for us. And so is the Johnny Depp poster, and the various half naked celebrity men pictures we have. The best is David Beckham. Who is in the perfect spot so if you're watching a movie you don't want to see you can just stare at him. :) We also have a huge Patrick the starfish from SpongeBob Square Pants. We don't even like SpongeBob. Another object of note is our street sign that says Trailer Trash Turnpike. 'Cuz we are classy.
Next on our tour is the kitchen. The only thing of note in there is our liquor bottle collection. We almost can't fit anymore on our shelves.
The bathroom... it's missing a washing machine. We have a dryer.. but no washing machine. I still don't quite get it. The one thing we do in there is smoke a lot of pot. Which is why it could quite possibly be more fun than the living room.
Next is my bedroom. Which isn't very exciting. So I'm not going to talk about it. :)

I Live in a Trailer Park

And I never in my wildest dreams thought I would. I am a girl most would describe as a "Princess" with my most prized possession being a pair of Christian Laboutin wedges. The Dior heels are up there too. I am a self proclaimed Label Whore. And I have no shame about it either. So how in the hell did I end up in a genuine trailer park? Well let me explain.
I grew up in St. Pete, FL, living the good life on the beach. Half way through high school my parents up and decided to move me away from all the craziness and live in a small mountain town in Western North Carolina. I guess they had had enough of me coming home smelling like weed and hungover my Sophomore year. So I started my Junior year at a school where I knew no one, and they had known each other since kindergarten. At least. Needless to say, I was invisible. Or I thought I was until after graduation I had all these guys coming up to me and telling me how much they had liked me. Oh well. It was time for college boys. Yee Haw.
I began the fall of my freshman year at a small public college in the mountains (if you are from this area I'm sure you can guess which one it is, otherwise, you've never heard of it). I lived in the dorms with a friend of mine from high school. Until she decided to become white trash and drop out. Through her I met quite a few people and made some pretty amazing friends. One of these is actually my roommate, in my trailer. Earlier this Spring we decided to move out of the dorms, because they SUCK. If you've ever lived in a dorm you know why. You can't hardly do anything without the risk of getting caught. I lived in an all girls dorm so I had to sneak my gentleman callers in and out. I couldn't drink really, being under age and all. Even though we still managed too. A lot. So the search began.
We decided we wanted a house. Not an apartment, she had already lived in one and said they are horrible. Looking in the classifieds one day we came across an ad for a trailer, not the one we live in though. We had a look, tried to get it, but he had already rented it. So we kept looking. One day we saw an ad for this one, called, met the landlady, and said yes to it.
For us being in a genuine trailer park, this one isn't bad. She completely re-did everything in it, and the walls are purple. Which I appreciate because it is my favorite color. Sure it has things wrong with it, a severe ant problem, some of the flooring near my door is bowed, hardly any hot water, and no washing machine. But it's OURS. And I LOVE it. Who would've thunk it, me in a trailer.

Now for a tour of the trailer park:
Well, there's ours of course, but you will hear all about it eventually.
Behind us is empty, Grandpa, as we called him, used to live there but he got evicted because he had a drinking problem. (It gets classier as we go on, I swear)
Next to him is a lady without a car, one night when Grandpa was drunk he wandered into her trailer.
I don't know the people, if there even are any, next to her.
Below them are the lesbians. Or at least I am a firm believer they are, it's two girls, one kid, and a car with a rainbow ribbon thing on it.
Next to them is our landlady's sister. Our landlady is awesome, her sister is not. I think she just got visitation of her kids because the whole first month we were here I didn't see them, and now they're here every weekend.
Next to her is us.
On the other side of us is the lady with 2 kids, and one on the way. She also still smokes. Her husband drinks Corona like a fish and is only nice when he's sober.
Below them is the husband's sister. She seems nice, and she has 2 redneck twins. The first day we were in here they walked right into our house and began talking to us. The second day my boyfriend and I were about to christen the living room and one of them walked in asking if the Playstation was set up yet.
And next to her is our landlady, her twins (I think they're twins), and her mom. Our landlady is super sweet, the complete opposite from her sister, but forgetful about everything.

And there ya have it, our trailer park.